So who do I stay with?
I've been greatly influenced by mentors who I've trusted for a year, 2 years, 4 years, 10 years.
Not landed with them, not rooted with them. Floating alongside. Long term, non-monogamous learning relationships :D
What characteristics do the teachers who I find myself circling back to again and again hold in common?
They allowed me to question them, including accepting I might have sustained disagreement over a long time. Not just allowed me to disagree with them on a few 'safe' topics, in preapproved way - but continued to teach me even when I held fundamental questions over a long time period.
They shared their own confusions, learnings, journeys with me. They didn't try to package everything up nicely into a bow where they had all the answers. They were willing to show me their own mistakes, and willing to tell me when they did not know an answer. They showed me where they came from, and where they were going. They let me watch them learn from their own teachers.
They valued my perspective. They encouraged me to learn from other people. They encouraged me to give them feedback on what I felt, what I noticed. They taught me how to look, rather than just telling me what they saw.
Allowed me to leave, and return and leave and return and leave and return
All of this required sustained trust and investment in both of our parts which was developed progressively over a long time.